photography: dead meat!!!

Learn to sacrifice. Giving your life for others is the most worthy thing you'll ever do in your lifetime. (Photo by: Radikus)


Photo was originally publishe d at http://www.radikus.wordpress.com/. Click here to see original post.

In search of "the" pet dog

My wife and I have been strongly considering getting and owning a pet this past few months. It was my idea to get one for ourselves since our other dog, Sushi, a mixed breed Labrador, is all grown up. He's turning three-years old this December 12.

I got the idea of having a toy dog because I envy those pet owners and enthusiasts who take their dogs for a walk and carry them to grocery stores. Aside from those petty reasons, I wanted a toy dog because I wanted to get a baby for the house. We've been married for three years now and having a baby proved too elusive just yet.

I wanted a baby and I want to invest on something that she's going to care and value for, something that could give a life to a home - just like any baby does.

I wanted a Siamese cat. There was a local pet owner selling her kittens for Php 1,500.00 (roughly $33 value).

She didn't like the idea.

So we settled for a dog. I initially wanted a pug. 

But my research showed that pug is a bearer of my worst nightmare for a dog-shedding too much hair. I also got to discover that the longer a dog hair grows, the lesser shedding you will get.

She fell in love with the Maltese.

But we couldn't find a local breeder/seller. I checked online shops and the price is not fit for our limited budget. So we zeroed-in with our next choice - Shih Tzu.

Shih Tzus are toy dogs and has long coats and wooly under coats. Also, this type of dog is considered hypoallergenic and is one of the dog breeds that sheds the least hair.

Owning a pet is a big responsibility, parenting one is another issue. We're still considering our options and we're still checking if we are psychologically prepared for this. We are just sure on one thing, we've developed our interest on dogs and we'll never be psychologically prepared until we have our own Shih Tzu.

If its a male, we'll call him Sacchio, if female ...i'll let her decide on it.

photography: Dirty fingers

May 10, 2010. Like most Filipinos who exercised their right of suffrage, we waited until our vote was cast and went home with dirty fingers. But its alright. Really nothing much to say. Its four dirty fingers out of the millions tinted last May 10, 2010.

(note: this phota wa originally posted in www.radikus.wordpress.com )

photography: Safe in her arms

This is one of the many pictures I have taken which I am proud of. Yes, I’m proud of it and yes its self-indulgent. This is a picture of my wife carrying her baby nephew when she was around six months old. She’s almost two years old now.
I like the honesty of the picture and the soothing beauty of the moment. Its the innocence of the child and the hearty caring for a child that makes this picture one that I’m proudest of.

wun manong: The father that never was...

I'm writing this because I feel that I want to and partly because I need to. After all, I'm part of the family as well.

I first saw him April 2003 at Lorenz's graduation party. We were briefly introduced then I had to join the group of fellow students to celebrate. We had beer, music, stories and laughter.We had fun.

I had mistaken him for being a chemist by profession because he seem to know so much about the chemical industry. I was not impressed though. He was just some ordinary guy, someone you'll probably bump into and forget after.

And that was all that I have of him.

Back then, 7 years ago, Lorenz was a friend. She was in a relationship to a guy named Christopher. I remember meeting her sisters (Lea, Lalaine, Lorraine), mother (Salome) and lola Soledad (who they endearingly call as nanay). That time, I was clueless of what their family was like. I just knew that he is Lorenz's father, and his name is William.

After that night, I never got to meet him again. Or maybe, if my memory serves me right, we were again introduced, a few months after. He had to meet his children at a local mall. Maybe I said "musta po?" or maybe I didn't. Perhaps I just smiled and probably we didn't shake hands.

That was how I had him, faceless and just someone you meet and forget after, unless he's someone close to people that are dear to you.

Still I was clueless why he had to meet his children out and not in their house.

Days, nights, weeks and years passed, the sun shone and storms came. I never heard of him again.

Lea grew up to be a fine young lady. Lalaine and Lorraine are now a successful career women, working as supervisors in their chosen fields and they are happy being that way. Lorraine is married and Lalaine is a single mom. 

As for Salome, she's probably the proudest mother in the world. For seven years, she labored hard to support her family on her own. She had to send them to school and disciplined them to be strong willed people. She reared her children not by word but by example. She is a superwoman.

Within the span of seven years, I came to know that theirs is a family broken by infidelity. William lived with his other woman and their relationship produced another sibling, Lyka.

Years passed and storms came. Lorenz has since broken-up with Christopher. She worked for private companies and now has her own business. She is married coincidentally to Kristoffer, me!

Quite a number of months back, William paid a visit in Los Baños. He brought with him Lyka. He saw Lea. But the meeting was not as ideal as people would consider. He aged so much that Lea didn't recognize him. It was not a happy moment though. It was a surprise and unwelcomed visit. 

He left Los Baños, and that was the last he'll set his foot there.

I remember asking my wife Lorenz, "Pano pag-nabalitaan niyong patay na siya, anu gagawin niyo". Her answer was uncertain. But she said "tatay pa rin naman namin siya".

And then the real news came. Monday, October 11, 2010. He died of cardio-respiratory complications.

Upon getting the news, the family decided to visit his remains. There they had known that the other woman left him for another man and that Lyka was left to his care. (Maybe it was karma, may be not). They also learned that he never let anyone know of his visit in Los Baños, and that he cried when Lea didn't recognize him.

I tried guaging his degree of "fatherness" to his children by asking, "meron ba kayong naalala na one "special" happy moment with your father na pwede niyong masabi na naging tatay niyo siya?"

The answer was a commanding wala (none).

The answer did not come as a surprise. From Salome's story he was never supportive on the formative years of their children. The fact of knowing that he left them for a different woman had impacted the consciousness of their children. And probably the greatest factor that led to their apathetic response was the fact that he was never there. That he was the father that never was.

Lalaine, probably, holds the heaviest grudge of the sisters and she's very vocal about it. She wanted him to live long and live the hard life. She wanted him to suffer the consequence of his actions.But Lalaine knows that all the pain must go before he is laid to rest. And she has that time, until tonight.

Being that William's family is poor, his relatives couldn't pay the hospital bills to take him out off the morgue. They needed assistance, and it was the first family who aided help. I remember them saying "kami na nga ang iniwan, hanggang sa kamatayan, kami pa rin ba ang gagastos? Ok lang gumastos basta para sa taong mahal mo. Pero sa kanya, mahirap." I couldn't blame them for saying it. I understand, for had it been me, it could have been worst.

Society may not understand or may be hard at understanding the way they think about their father. I guess it takes one to know one, or maybe, immersion is key. I lived with them, and I only knew much about their lives. And if immersion is a key, then it gives me credit.

As the saying goes " live life to its fullest, life is too short to be wasted. Live a life in error while you're still young, for you have your whole life to correct it." But what if time was short and did not live you're life to its limit? What if you lived your life in error and never lived the day to correct it?

William had the latter part.  He may have lived the life he wanted, but surely did live life to its fullest. It was a life in error and he didn't live to correct it. I just want to wish him well. This is his past life, and I hope he gets to correct things if given a chance for a new life.

from the back seat: Ploning-two years after

When it comes to movies, I admit, I'm outdated. Outdated in a sense that I would rather watch movies years after its release in theaters, I don't watch on its premiere night or during its week-long, or sometimes extended runs in cinemas. Last movie I watched in a sinehan is Astroboy, and those who knew me well would understand. Reason: I prefer watching classics than just flicks.

I'm outdated because I find pleasure in scavenging for old, worn-out and used VCDs in video stores like Video City. There's this fulfilled feeling when you get to buy a CD of a movie you wanted to watch in cinemas but just didn't because of reason I've stated above. So far, I've got a few: Kubrador, American Splendor (voted as one of the top 10 greatest movies of the decade by a movie critic), The West Side Story (1961 Oscar Awards Best Picture), Wall-E, Penguin Penguin Paano Ka Ginawa, and some other local indie films and one foreign indie Kitchen Party. For the purpose of this blog, I'll cover one movie from my "collection", Ploning.

I got the copy about 6 months ago. Quite a number of instances, I attempted to watch it. But I had to cut it because I was not in the mood. So I thought maybe, how you enjoy movies is dependent on your state of mind. If you're too tired, you may not enjoy movies that need mental activity and would prefer rather the light, heartwarming and visually exciting types like romantic comedies and love stories. Also, movie appreciation depends on who you watch it with. If you are with a group, depending on the time of day, you may enjoy horror flicks, especially Asian horrors like Grudge, The Maid (starring Alessandra de Rossi) and my all time favorite Shutter. 

Again there are many other ways to enjoy a movie. And two days ago, I found the time to finally finish Ploning which casts Judy Ann Santos and was the Philippine entry to the Oscars in 2008. Much have been publicized about this movie and there are a bounty of film reviews in the internet. And this is how Radikus saw it:

In a nutshell: its the story of a man/young boy named Digo who found innocent love to Ploning. Ploning, on the other hand, is a woman who lost her love and chose to keep the pain hidden inside her heart. She's mysterious in a way that people in her community knows her as Ploning and nothing else. 

There are a number of twists in the movie: the revelation why she showed no affection to her father and why she chose to wear a white dress in his father's funeral, why she likes killing time in a cemetery, why she dearly adores the little boy Digo, and how is it that she is a friend to everyone but never a friend by anyone. Huh!!!??!

In the end, there was just one answer to all the questions - LOVE. She loved her father dearly that she had to wear the white dress he requested her to wear on his funeral, even if its was seen as taboo to her community. She finds solace in the quietness of a cemetery to connect to her dead lover, Thomas (whose death was kept secret to the islanders) and how she endearingly loves Digo who was born the day Thomas died.

Shot entirely in the island of Cuyo, Palawan, the movie succeeds in transporting its audience into a reverie where life is rural, laid-back, very provincial and very Filipino. The movie making style, alternating the past (Ploning and Digo as a boy) and the present (Digo, all grown-up and searching for Ploning) may confuse viewers but its all there for a purpose-to show how it is to amke a great movie and a well thought plan. The settings, cinematography and even the sounds and music combined too well and blended so great that you'll feel like you're in Cuyo. There's the eerie feeling of nostalgic sadness that I ended up teary-eyed long after all those unsung names have gone up my TV screen.

I've noticed that everytime I finish watching a movie, I say one of these three expressions:

Tapos na? Yun na yun?

Walang kwenta....

Tang ina, ang ganda....

For Ploning, I remember uttering to myself, "tang ina, ang ganda....its a classic". And I'm happy that I lived a day to see one golden moment in Philippine movies.

Also, this is Judy Ann Santos' most notable performance yet, no "gripos" of tears, no fancy acting, just pure emotions and character. Now, she's an actress and I'd compare this performance to Maricel Soriano's Inang Yaya


picture attribute taken here

from the back seat: Love, when you miss it like crazy

I like Bea Alonzo...she looks like my wife.

I like John Lloyd Cruz.......he looks like me!!!

Wait, let me explain. I know, you would disagree. Life is unfair. I know that for a fact.

I like watching Pinoy movies but I choose what I watch. I am a fan of love flicks depending on my mood, and John Lloyd-Bea is my favorite love-team, next to then Rico Yan-Claudine Barretto (re: Got to Believe).

Yesterday, I watched the movie Miss You Like Crazy directed by Cathy Garcia-Molina. A week before that, I watched Babe I love You starring Sam Milby and Anne Curtis. And I'm waiting for You to me are Everything with Dingdong Dantes and Marian Rivera to be available at Video City so I can watch it. Better to wait a few months after it comes out in theaters rather than watch it on a pirated DVD. Its a crime, you know?!

Finding reason

Mia (Alonzo) plays the role of an OCW working as a receptionist in a Malaysian hotel. She's back from Malaysia to spend the holidays with her family. She'd developed a habit of writing down her feelings on stones and leaves it where she wrote it.

Allan (Cruz) plays a successful banker engaged to Daphne (Maricar Reyes). Allan is not happy with the relationship and when he finds the stone scribblings of Mia, he found liberty that some shares how he feels.

They met, they became friends, they liked each other, and eventually fell in love. Until Mia's departure back to Malaysia. Allan made a promise that they will meet on the ferry boat, made a promise to clear the issues and free himself for Mia. Mia waited by the ferry boat, he didn't arrive.

The night before, Allan wanted a break-up with Daphne...And here's how it went.

(Allan showed Daphne his old house and asks Daphne) "What if I ask you to live here."

(Daphne replied) Ayoko. Its old, musty and falling apart"

(They entered the room, Allan was brewing an argument. Daphne asked) "Are you looking for a fight?"

(Allan replied) "I'm looking for a reason to fight...for you. All my life I've been trying na miki-bagay sa buhay mo. Its time that you live with mine.

(Daphne is close to crying and said) But why didn't you tell me

(Allan)This is my life, old, musty and falling apart"

I'm not sure if those were the exact words. Its the part of the movie that made its mark.

Two years after

Mia is back in Malaysia. She found a new love, a Malaysian business man. Allan has broken up with Daphne and he's in Malaysia to attend a business summit...and search for Mia.

They met and discovered for themselves that their love for each other still lingers. But they just can't.

The story is old school. But how John Lloyd played the role of a man desperately in search for his girl, only to find out that she's engaged is the most heartbreaking part. He portrayed the role so effectively that any real man, or woman, who have found his/her own true love would agree. Its great to fall in-love, its that unexplainable feeling of being close-to-crying but not because of sorrow that makes it so aahh, damn. ...and I'll say it..putang-ina, ang sarap ma-in love.

As for Bea, she also did her part. Look at how she has grown from "One More Chance" to this. Good thing that she's doing more mature roles. Fits her age, fits her body. I like their love scene by the stairs. Two hungry souls, yearning for love, looking for reasons to quench their thirst, but had to hold it back.

Believing in destiny

If you believe in destiny , this is surely a must-see, quote-unquote, movie. If you want to fall in love, you can find it in many different places. But if you just want to nurture the "feeling" of love. Try sitting back. Relax. See a movie. And travel with that someone. take a deep breath and take a one minute vacation. Relive your happiest moment..and surely, it'll start a fire.

Note:Article picture was taken here